5 Things That Turn Women Off

Women are attracted to a lot of different qualities in men, but when it comes to what turns women off, some traits and actions are almost universal.

Self pity

Self pity is not only unattractive, it's also one of the most personally harmful activities a person can engage in. Ironically, the time that men are MOST likely to engage in self pity is when they're not having success with women.

Misfortune in other walks of life, men can shake off. Failure with women? Oh, here comes the pity party.

The best way to shake off self pity is by refusing to express it even when you feel it. This is a true "fake it 'till you make it." type of therapy. Keeping your focus on improving yourself will also help you avoid this self destructive emotion.

Bragging

A lot of men mistakenly think that bragging is an alpha male trait. Nope. Bragging signals insecurity and weakness. It's also socially rude, something women are particularly sensitive about.

If you're looking to highlight your positives to women, do it by showing rather than telling.

Gossiping

Women hate gossipy men primarily because gossip is an activity that is both negative and feminine. Double whammy.

Oh, yeah... and blah blah blah I'm a sexist. Okay fine. I'm a sexist. I'm also right.

If you want to, uh, NOT look like a man, go ahead and gossip it up with the gals standing by the coffee maker. You can be their best gossip buddy. What you won't be is the guy sleeping with any of them.

Jealousy

See above. This is another behavior that is both negative and feminine in nature. If you're sensing a theme here, congratulations.

Women want men to act like men. And they'd far prefer negative masculine behaviors than negative feminine ones.

Complaining

Here's a great way to make a woman be more attracted to you without even knowing why--stop complaining. Women like doers and fixers. They want men who stay calm in the face of adversity and just... handle shit.

Now here's the thing... not being a complainer is hard. If you're honest with yourself, you probably complain about all kinds of stuff when you should be closing your mouth and just getting about the business of getting things done.

(I'm guilty, too.)

The best way to escape the urge to complain is to shift your focus to having some sort of positive effect on someone else. Make someone smile or laugh or be a good listener for someone else who's having a bad day.

These kinds of things won't win you outright praise, but it's something that other people notice on a deeper level when evaluating your strength of character.

And when it comes right down to it, that's the big difference between turning a woman on and turning her off--whether or not you're showing strength or weakness.

Go take a look at all those weaknesses above. They all betray personal weakness in some form. And that's no accident.

Society has changed dramatically in the last couple of hundred of years, but women are still wired to be attracted to the security and protection that displays of strength imply.

So when you're giving your attraction level a tune-up always remember--you can't fight biology.