I'm not going to pretend to be an expert or a guru on relationships or online dating, but I will tell you that I have been with my wife for 11 years, married for 6. What I believe is that if a relationship is too easy and happens fast, then it is usually not the real thing. I believe true love takes hard work, but the rewards are great. In this article I'm going to talk about things to watch for and things to watch out for when using online dating sites. The main things to look for online are opening lines and topics of conversation.
The person's opening line will usually tell you all about what they are after. I say "usually" because only Siths deal in absolutes. (inside Star Wars joke.) If a man wants sex, his opening line will usually be something like "what's up sexy" or "Hey sexy". It's right there in front of you. But don't think females are the innocent ones. It goes both ways. A female's opening line might be "hey baller" or "hey cutie". Translation, "I'm lookin for money or I need somebody cute so I can have cute babies". Just jokes, don't get mad. Seriously though, the first line will say a lot about what they are looking for online and should not be ignored.
What follows the first line will be agenda. A man after sex might try his best to keep the topic on intercourse. A female might start talking about her dorm room at school and his reply would be, "I bet they get it on all the time there huh?". I'm not saying that's a bad thing, if you're looking for that then do you. This article is merely talking about speculations and observations that I've made on these websites. In the same token, a woman after money or a husband will give interviews and interrogations. She will usually have no shame about asking about your financial situation and background, even if she hasn't experienced success in her own career. I would suggest to take these signals as a serious red flag. These women are usually controlled by some kind of malicious pimp. The woman will seem sweet as Texas tea, but you stop the cash from rolling in and you will definitely meet her other half.
That brings up the topic of meeting people from dating and chat sites. Never, ever, ever meet anybody who wants to meet right away. Chances are, if they will meet you that fast, then they have met countless others the same way. I consider these people to be social addicts. They thrive off of meeting new people, then throwing them to the wayside. They are obsessed with adding friends to their pages and never bother to talk to them after they get that thrill. Some are innocent but some can also be psychotic. The other dangers are of course STD's and possibly being assaulted or worse. I would advise to meet in public well lit places and try to have others around at least the first time.
Of course most of this is just common sense, for inner city people. We grow up being told not to talk to strangers, but then if we did that we would never meet anybody new. The bottom line is just be careful and fully assess the situation and topics. Most of the time, the person is purposely trying to send you signals about what they want so pay close attention.
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