The first date with a woman is very important, because this is when she forms the majority of her impression of you and decides where you fit in her view of men.
Are you relationship material, fun hang out material, stuck in the friendzone or just a free meal?
Unfortunately, many men don't really understand what to do when it comes to wooing members of the opposite sex. Remember that first impressions last and you will never get this opportunity ever again so you need to understand the dynamics of the first date so you can take control and make your first dates not just a positive experience for you but for her too.
By the end of your date she should know under no uncertain terms that she's spent the evening with a real man. Ignore the wisdom below and you'll be seen as just another boy playing dress-up in his Daddy's clothes.
Here are some useful first date tips that will turn you from newbie to ninja in record time.
First Date Tip No.1- The Meaning Of Conversation Means You Talk AND listen
The secret to a great first date is finding the right balance between being talkative and listening to what the other person has to say.
Remember, you're goal is to learn about her. Remember, you're the chooser just as much or more than she is. Most guys are just happy to not be at home staring at the computer one handed so they're much too passive about this.
The goal isn't just to have a date, any monkey can do that.
Here's a tip, always finish your sentences with a question, this will help keep the conversation going, it will also tell your date that you're interested in what she has to say. Ask a question, then lean back and listen to the answer. Listen! Don't just wait for your chance to keep talking.
You'll be amazed that the less you say and the more you listen the more connected to you she'll feel which can pay dividends for you later.
First Date TipNo.2-Her Body Language Tells A Story
Body language is very important. In fact, the majority of communication happens this way. Some assert that between 60% to as much as 93% of all communication comes through non-verbal cues. What does that mean?
It means that you should be paying attention to the signals that your date is giving off. She's literally telling you how she feels about you and what she wants you to do with her.
Her body will tell you a ton of things. For instance, is she having a good time? Is she in to you? Does she want to kiss you? Etc...
An easy newbie test is eye-contact,if she meets your eye when you talk then you know that she's interested in what you have to say.If she looks at you smiles and lowers her gaze submissively that means you're doing an even better job. It means you make her kinda nervous but in a good way.
Key positive body language signs are:
-is she leaning in towards you?
-is her body turned to a face yours versus turned to the side?
-does she play with her hair when you talk?
-when you're close does she briefly glance at your mouth (that means she's considering kissing you)?
-if you're holding her hand, squeeze it gently, she should squeeze it back?
Bad body language signs are:
-does she glance at the exit, her watch or her cell phone a lot?
-is fiddling with her phone and sending texts more important that paying attention to you?
-does she lean back away from you while sitting at the table?
-does she turn her body to so it's angled to the side away from you?
-does she answer your questions in short non-committal answers (it's the way she answers that's more important than what she actually says)?
First Date Tip No.3- Don't Try Too Hard
Don't try too hard to impress your date, it doesn't look natural and she will definitely notice that you are struggling. Just keep calm and casual, don't go overboard, for instance if you're meeting the girl for the first time you don't have to give her a bouquet of a dozen or so roses,it will more likely scare her away if you do.
The name of the game is to create a memorable fun experience.
Don't try to impress her by shelling out a bunch of money at an expensive restaurant, save your money for when you have a real relationship. Trust me you'll need it.
You're only goal during a first date is to make sure you both have a good time together. If you do that job well and keep her laughing through the night then you're good to go.
This should be more than enough to get you started in the right direction. Remember, be cool, calm and show her that you're comfortable in your own skin.
If you do this right then you'll be the guy she'll be texting all her girlfriends about while she's bored out of her mind having dinner with next guy who just doesn't get it. He'll shell out $100 for dinner then go back home alone and you'll get the girl.
Congratulations, you're now a FIRST DATE NINJA!
No comments:
Post a Comment